I’ve recently been told that I’m the ‘’absolute worst blogger” on a friend’s entire list of bookmarks. That really smarts. NOT.

I just want to write about the Six Feet Under series finale, but I can’t because one of the five people who read this hasn’t caught up yet. At this point, I don’t see how he could have avoided all the hype. I also don’t see how I’m going to cash in on the $50 bet I thought I had won because I picked the correct major character to die. Oof.

I’m not too sad about the show expiring, because all shows do and this one ended well. There are always DVDs, On Demand, or the nine shoeboxes full of taped episodes in my parents’ bedroom closet. What I’m sad about is that I no longer get to have my character crush on Nate. I loved Nate, especially Season 1 Nate, Season 2 Nate, and Nate’s scuffed-up dark brown leather jacket. Oh, my, it was perfect.

Keep in mind I say *character* crush, as I for some reason have never, ever had the hots for a celebrity. It’s not that I dislike the famous, it’s just that I don’t really care about them unless they’ve proven to be really funny and/or smart on their own, sans camera and script. I don’t find it interesting when hot young celebs are caught on camera eating (the horror!), driving, or walking, ‘’just like us!'’ Chances are my next-door neighbor, who I’ve also never met, would be just as compelling in person.

The character crush makes more sense to me. I’m not sure I would dig Nate’s actor, Peter Krause. I might, but it doesn’t matter because I’ll never meet him and don’t particularly want to. I wanted to meet Nate, goddamnit! But I understood that it never would have worked out, given that we live on separate coasts, we have differing opinions about processed foods, and he is not a real person. All important factors.

And yet, I still had the urge to hang a Gap ad featuring Peter Krause in my room. This goes against everything I just wrote above, but it’s okay because a friend gave me the ad as a joke, and because P.K. is really not that bad to look at. I do resent, though, the outfit selected for him here. It is entirely un-Nate. Nate was always wearing a dark t-shirt and shorts (for jogging), a dark suit (for work, but he didn’t appreciate the dress code), or nothing (for sleeping and sex). Nate would never have chosen this dark blue striped oxford shirt, available for $22 at Gap stores nationwide. Nate also wouldn’t have looked oddly petrified while clutching a large-buckled belt. He just wasn’t like that. Okay?

Even when I was little, whenever I faced the question of which celebrity I’d most like to make out with, I never had an answer. The whole concept seemed so ludicrous that I wouldn’t even let myself stoop to the level of making something up. I probably ruined everyone’s fun by staring blankly at the questioner and demanding “Why?” in a low voice, more of a statement than a question, really. That condescending, “I’m cooler than you and one day, not today because you’re really popular, but years and years down the line, you’ll know it too” tone of voice. I’m sure that went over really well. Maybe I should have just said Brad Pitt. He’s like, hot.

So, many thanks to SFU for finally giving me an answer, even if choosing a character instead of an actor totally goes against the rules. Rest in peace, Nate. Call me!