Hmmm… what’s for breakfast? I’ll take a medium hazelnut coffee and the Living Arts section, thanks. File this underMost Random (or Most Effective — you choose) Placement of an Egg & Cheese Sandwich… Ever.

I mean, wow. It’s even on a croissant, which is hands-down the best way to enjoy E&C. And it has nothing to do with the newspaper. It’s quite possibly the most perfect image I have ever discovered on the Internet.

How could the two items possibly relate? Are NYT readers the best readers in the city, so therefore would likely choose the best breakfast sandwich in the city? In that way, the E&C could be like a compliment to the Times’ clientele. Or maybe it’s like a lollipop at the eye doctor’s office — sit through this stodgy newspaper (or get blinding drops placed into your eyes) and you will have earned a delicious, fat-drenched breakfast treat! Or maybe the image suggests that the NYT is as sexy, desirable, and downright tasty as an E&C croissant. Or, I guess, the ad could be suggesting that for the price of a breakfast sandwich, one could instead have a subscription. But that goes against the apparent continuity of the sandwich/paper combo and besides, people in New York don’t usually eat E&C because they have to keep skinny for each other. It’s the unspoken bond: You don’t eat, I won’t either, and we’ll all get depressed and strung out together. Party!

Those are four okay theories. But look closely. I’ve been missing the point. Check the headline right below the E&C. This has to be intentional. Much like the U.S. as concerns invading Iraq, readers of the NYT will have the opportunity to “attack” egg & cheese sandwiches from three unique angles. Or more, since the average Times reader is undoubtedly much more creative than the average U.S. citizen.

I’m really not quite sure where this website has yet to go now. After this, everything else will just seem mediocre. Like the other New York City newspapers! I get it!

Speaking of mediocre, new glasses:

How creepy is this? I feel like they should use this photo on public service announcements about stalkers.
They’d say SHE’S WATCHING YOU, or something better. Oooh.